Welcome to the Geekend: Global Warming Edition (100% Bear Free)

So, hot off the annual Earth Day weekend, we get a week full of  weather that reminds us that Mother Earth is actively attempting to delete us as a species and carve the way for the eerily precocious bears to take their true places as Lords of Nature and Destroyers of Humanity.

Charmin Bear

What I’m actually hoping for is an apocalypse of epic proportion issued forth by the melding of all three of Dwight Schrute’s obsessions. Unfortunately, it seems that such an apocalypse would have to be engineered solely through the dedication of a consortium of human beings as opposed to arising organically from the conjunction of ursine evolution, agricultural crises, and human hubris.

Ah, well.

In the meantime, try these diversionary tactics created for you by other human beings (not bears) in a futile attempt to distract yourself from our impending doom.




Rory's Stag Party

What: Doctor Who Burlesque @ Red Palace
Swami YoMahmi, the Original Sideshow Geek, presents an inter-dimensional burlesque adventure through the universe of Doctor Who. Featuring out-of-this-world burlesque from the always surprising and sexy Reverend Valentine, Candy del Rio, and Eerie Twilight, plus sonic sideshow by Mab Just Mab, and introducing erotic stage kitten Gaia Phoenix. So grab your scarf and your favorite Companion, count the shadows, and DON’T BLINK!
When: SHOW 1: Doors @ 8:30 pm / Show @ 9pm, SHOW 2: Doors @ 10:30pm / Show @ 11pm
Where: Red Palace, 1212 H Street NE, Washington DC, 20002
Metro: Try this map.
How Much: $10 online/$12 at the door
Pro-tips: Get ready to make a Rory face, a la Rory’s stag. Also, if you’ve got a Rory’s Stag t-shirt, now would be the time to rock it. But no rocking out with your cock ring out. Let’s keep it calm and carry on like the true Doctor Who fans that we are. LOL. What am I saying? The Doctor’s the most frenetic British sentient, time-traveling alien being I’ve ever watched on tv. Even sexy-sexy-angel-on-your-shoulder-Dr.-Gaius-Baltar is calmer.


Kiki's Delivery Service

What: Kiki’s Delivery Service @ AFI Silver
A young witch-in-training named Kiki sets out to seek her fortune, aided by her flying broom and her faithful black cat Jiji. Settling in a picturesque seaside village, Kiki takes a job as a delivery girl for a bakery, later starting her own business, a flying-broom-powered delivery service. In a moment of self-doubt, Kiki loses her magic; now she must persevere and innovate using all the power of her imagination and self-reliance. Featuring voices by Kirsten Dunst, Phil Hartman and Janeane Garofalo.
When: Friday, 4/27, 5:10pm OR Saturday, 4/28, 11am OR Sunday, 4/29, 9:45pm OR Monday, 4/30, 12:35pm OR Wednesday, 5/2, 12:35pm
Where: AFI Silver, 8633 Colesville Road, Silver Spring, MD
Metro: Silver Spring, Red line
How Much: $8.50 Matinee (M-F before 6pm)/ $11.50 General Admission
Pro-tips: The AFI Silver’s doing a fantastic Miyazaki film series right now, with Princess Mononoke, Spirited Away, and Howl’s Moving Castle still to come, alongside lesser known creatures such as Porco Rosso. Dunno when you’re going to get a chance to see his stunning visuals splashed against a big screen again, so otaku and casual fans alike should alight upon this theater as soon as possible. Purists should beware that this is a dub not a sub. Also, apparently the AFI Silver knows a good thing when it sees one so they’ve added multiple new showtimes for Kiki. You can now catch it sometime between today and Wednesday.


Source: hello-zombie.tumblr.com

What: Midnight Screening of The Room @ E St. Cinema
When: Friday, 4/27, 12am-2am OR Saturday, 4/28, 12am-2am
Where: E St Cinema, 555 11th St NW, Washington, DC
Metro: Metro Center, Red, Blue/Orange lines
Pro-tips: “You are tearing me apart, Lisa!” I have still yet to figure out if this is a deeply ironic take on cray-cray, lo-fi cinema or if it’s a heartfelt attempt at heart-wrenching drama on the part of Tommy Wiseau. Either way, Mr. Wiseau has created a cult sensation that requires a particular brand of post-midnight hysteria and sleep deprivation in order to fully appreciate the genius that is The Room.


Source: Brightest Young Things

What: Forward Fest Day 3/Metal @ The Warehouse/Loft
A night of all encompassing bass music featuring a lineup comprised of the world’s freshest talent.
Warehouse Room 2: JACQUES GREENE ; SILKIE ; Refugee b2b Whighzeguy
Loft: Frite Nite Label Showcase w/ B.BRAVO, SALVA & COMMA ; Sonic Butter
Loft Side Room: Meso Creso Lounge – v:shal kanwar, vANNIEty Kills, Sequoia, BEATrix, Inda Nile, Zakhm
Outside (The Alley of Boom): Manifest Takeover – Soohan b2b Fractal ; SGNL w/ Frances EmDee Live & Lauren Shaw ; Locks b2b Julez
+Live art, Sculpted Installations, Digital Installations, Visual Projections, Fire dancers, Aerial Dance Performances
For more info about the artists playing this event please visit our website: http://www.forwarddc.com/artists.html
When: 9pm-5am
Where: Warehouse/Loft, 411 New York Ave NE, Washington, DC
Metro: New York Ave/Florida Ave/Gallaudet U, Red line
How Much: $30
Pro-tips: Bass Bonanza ahead for self-professed Bass Nerds. For all you techno/electro/house/dub/vibrate through your chest music fans, here’s the festival of your dreams. If Tron and Attack the Block and Girl With a Dragon Tattoo can get the electronic music treatment, then so can you. Just imagine you’re in the cyberpunk novel of your choice along with the occasional human/computer hybrid virus download and cyborg cybernetic program malfunction. Plus, the fact that the entire festival seems to be running on an elemental theme doesn’t hurt.


What: Weekly GCOM Game Night @ Tastee Diner
When: Each Friday, 7pm-11pm
Where: Tastee Diner, 8601 Cameron Road, Silver Spring, MD
Metro: Silver Spring, Red line
How Much: Free
Pro-tips: You can bring a game, but really, there’s no need unless you’ve got a real hankering for a particular game. Weekly way to unwind and win some WOOT points.




Source: Linzarcher on Deviant Art

What: USA Science and Engineering Festival @ the Convention Center
When: Sat, April 28, 2012, 10am-6pm AND Sun, April 29, 2012, 10am-4pm
Where: Walter E. Washington Convention Center, 801 Mt. Vernon Pl., Washington DC
Metro: Mt. Vernon Sq/7th St-Convention Center, Green/Yellow line
How Much: Free
Pro-tips: Obviously, the biggest draw is the Mythbusters stage show, starring our favorite geeks doing our favorite thing . No, not dressing up steampunk, unfortunately. But, our second favorite thing, which is testing science to destruction. Get to your seat early (even as early as the previous show, a la Hall H at Comic Con) and hold on for dear life. Or, coordinate with this group to see if you can all get seats together around 1pm-2pm. There’s nothing quite like geeking out with other geeks over some other, more famous geeks doing geeky things. Am I rite or amirite?

Don’t forget about the Book Fair or Mayim Bailik, neuroscientist and Big Bang Theory actress or The Physics of Superheroes. Honestly, this is the geekiest/coolest/most awesome thing happening all weekend! Don’t be surprised if you bump into Bill Nye.


What: “1958” 80’s Dance Party @ Rock n’ Roll Hotel
Party-rocking DJ Dredd spins music by Madonna, Prince and Michael Jackson — three artists who were all born in the summer of 1958.
When: Doors Open 8pm/ Show Starts 9pm
Where: Rock n’ Roll Hotel, 1353 H St NE, Washington, DC
Metro: Try this map.
How Much: $13
Pro-tips: 1958 was a great year for science. But why celebrate that when you could celebrate the birth of three of Pop’s superstars? I, for one, feel that an attempt to re-create Yuri’s Night is the only correct response to this dance party invitation, but be aware that not everyone will be dressed as a 1950’s NASA employee or Explorer 1.  Here’s Prince singing about sex and space. You’re welcome.


Buffy S4

What: Hellmouth Happy Hour @ Black Cat
When: 7pm-8pm
Where: Black Cat, 1811 14th St NW, Washington DC
Metro: U Street/African American Civil War Memorial/Cardozo, Green/Yellow lines
How Much: Free
Pro-tips: Oh, season 4, when hardcore Buffy fans went off the rails and some of the best/worst episodes aired. Dunno what the viewing crowd’s gonna be like, but this week’s episode is Living Conditions and who doesn’t know what it’s like to share a room? Oh, I’m sorry, Mr. Privileged, did you have an entire freshman room to yourself? Well, consider yourself extremely lucky and STFU.


Udvar Hazy Air and Space Museum Meetup Trip

What: A trip to the Air and Space Museum annex to visit the newly arrived Challenger shuttle.  You’ll have to sign up for the Meetup group to get in on the carpool but this annex is SO worth the visit. Ever hankered to see the inspiration for the X-movies’ X-jet? WELP, the Udvar Hazy ASMA is your cuppa.
When: 10:3omam
Where: Udvar Hazy Air and Space Museum, 14390 Air and Space Museum Pkwy, Chantilly, VA
Metro: Unfortunately, car only, and there’s a parking fee of $15 per car.
How much: $15/car parking fee
Pro-tips: Join the meetup group that’s hosting, and don’t be a creeper. Also, don’t forget that you’ll have to cover some of the parking fee if you’re catching a ride.




Source: obsoletegamer.com

What: Gamer Symphony Orchestra @ the American Art Museum
When: 3pm-4pm
Where: Kogod Courtyard, American Art Museum, 8th and F St NW, Washington, DC
Metro: Chinatown/Gallery Pl, Red line
How Much: Free
Pro-tips: Go early. It’s like every meetup group ever decided to go check out the exhibit this day, so earliness can only help. Also, you can totes sneak food into the courtyard where there are chairs and tables set up, so pick up some bao or sushi from down the street and enjoy the concert in style.


Houlihan's = Muy Classy

What:VA Scifi/Fantasy Book Club Spring Mixer @Houlihan’s
Please join us for our first weekend happy hour! Since our group has been growing so fast, we’ve seen so much interest in our events that we’ve had to limit space at the majority of them. It’s been a while since our entire group has been able to get together without restrictions or waitlists. So a few times a year, we’ll be holding special events (such as happy hours, picnics, parties, etc.) so that we can all get together to mingle and socialize and to meet members we may not have shared an event with yet. We’ll also be using this time to hold a book swap. If you have any science fiction or fantasy books that you’re no longer interested in keeping, please bring them to trade or pass on to other members. This is a great way to discover new authors (and help others do the same), while clearing space on your bookshelves!
When: 4pm
Where: Houlihan’s, 6550 Loisdale Rd, Springfield, VA
Metro: Franconia/Springfield, Blue line then a bus. I’m not sure which bus. But probably whichever one goes to the ginormous shopping complex. Yeah, that one.
How Much: Free but you’ll probably want to purchase some drinks or bar food
Pro-tips: Go? Have fun. Again, as with all meetups, don’t be a creeper and don’t be overcome. The whole point is to meet peeps with similar interests.


What: Trivia @ Quarry House Tavern
When: 7-8pm
Where: Quarry House Tavern, 8401 Georgia Ave, Silver Spring, MD
Metro: Silver Spring, Red line
How Much: Free
Pro-tips: Go for the tater tots. Stay for the tater tots. Especially the ones covered in bacon and cheese. This week’s trivia will cover Famous Museums and Canada. Right. Gather all your favorite Mounties, moose, and hockey players. You should already know about famous museums, living in a city full of free ones. Also, three points if you can tell me what’s wrong with the picture for this event.



About DistrictofGeeks

A small geeky fish making it's way through the District of Geeks!
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